I am going to retire this blog
and begin a new one.
Thank you for reading;
Please email me or comment
if you are interested in
getting linked to the new one,
and I will be sure to let you know the address.

kitchen, b&b/inn in the nevada desert.

they caught my eye: two cowboys in my backyard

it caught my eye: first coffee of 2012

"Greek mythos is filled with reports of young women being accompanied by wolf women or lion women or other figures who served as initiators." (Estes)

it caught my eye: mission district (any guesses on what this is?)

it caught my eye: berkeley

one of my favorite bands, over the rhine, has a beautiful website.
linford and karen detweiler (the couple who are the lead musicians) often post letters to their readers,
and even their letters contain poetry.

once, i wrote them a letter-
sharing how their music has remained a constant through every change in my life,
as they are not afraid to write of both faith and doubt,
hope and fear,
finding jesus in a bar in new orleans,
wanting the whole enchilada,
wanting a child and yet aware of
the awful place this world can be ("changes come"),
love and love and so much love.

that is my intro to the treasure i just found
in linford's writing recently:

"The younger version of me:
I was often overwhelmed with how to respond
to the unwieldy gift of being alive
in this beautiful, heartbreaking world.
I didn't know where to begin."

i know what he means.

a note

hi friends/readers::
you may have stumbled here by way of an email with a link of some sort.
i hope it's not too hard to get here now.
due to some privacy concerns, i am making this little blog private for a while.
i hope you still stop by until it's public again:)

this is a sweet, small creative diary of sorts for me,
so i wanted to keep it alive...
i hope it shines light into your world as well.

Awake in Time

Annie Dillard:
"I am sitting under the sycamore by Tinker Creek. It is early spring...I have come to the creek-the backyard stretch of the creek-in the middle of the day, to feel the delicate gathering of heat, real sun's heat, in the air, and to watch new water come down the creek. Don't expect more than this, and a mental ramble.
I'm in the market for some present tense;
I'm on the lookout, shopping around, moreso every year. It's a seller's market-Do you think I won't sell all that I have to buy it?
Thomas Merton wrote, in a light passage in one of his Gethsemane journals: 'Suggested emandation in the Lord's Prayer: Take out 'Thy Kingdom Come' and substitute 'Give us time!'
But Time is the One Thing We Have Been Given, and We Have Been Given To Time.
Time gives us a whirl.
We keep waking from a dream we can't recall, looking around in surprise, and lapsing back, for years on end.
All I want to do is stay awake.,
keep my head up,
prop my eyes open, with toothpicks, with trees."

It's November 23rd again. I am Awake. I am entering a new year- my 31st.
And I feel so grateful to be Awake, fully inside of this- this experience we all try to name and explain.

Ask me what I want for my birthday:
To See.
To participate in Beauty and be graced to stand in Her Awe.
To share it with the warmth of those I Love.

sitting in an explosion of
clothes
emptied drawers
bulging luggage bags from a recent trip to ohio
papers
loose ends

outside there is wetness
coolness
clouds and sun peeking through

and i am grateful for this space,
for space in general.
it seems that how we use our spaces,
especially personal spaces,
reveals a great deal-
for example,
is it open or filled?
is it getting fresh air?
does it smell good?
does it feel good, to the eyes, to the chest, to the heart, to the mind?

a space i love and spend a good deal of time...




and a surprise guest,


the innocence mission (befriended) will now sing me through clearing these piles i just made to get my room closer to what i need to feel like there is opening, light, newness, good smells, and most importantly: Love

(design credits to danielle)

quieted

today:
very little to write
or say:::...

steve's guitar strumming,
chickens rejoicing over a newly laid egg
and me, happy to post these photos from a day driving along the coast.


and, i realize that the sea also has this effect
of quieting a heart
the salt air
the sounds
the attention all those along its coast give
to this huge force

the feet know it

there is a place
where the town ends
and the fields begin
it's not marked
but the feet know it
also
the heart
that is longing
for refreshment
and, equally for
repose
(mary oliver)

root
down
stretch
wildly
up.ward.

ring the bells

Since arriving in California,
I have stayed close to home- in Berkeley,
mostly because I was longing to be in a small community,
something less urban than Philly.
I was not eager to be in the SF city environment

((the birds they sang at the break of day: Start again))

But, the first part of SF I went to
was the Mission (thank you, Steve),
and, it is the place I keep returning to.
I have found light
and color
and something
so
new
so
unexpected
so extraordinary...

((I heard them say Don't dwell on what has passed away or what is yet to be))

The universe seems to
provide messages
and magic
in her streets
windows
murals
mosaics

((Ah the wars they will be fought again The holy dove She will be caught again bought and sold and bought again the dove is never free.))



Plus, there are great cars


and, great cheeseburgers (((mmmm)))

and, great Beauty...in many forms, more of which I am sure I will be telling of in images and words


"Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack in everything
That's how the light gets in." (Leonard Cohen)

The best parts

I recently learned about the collar pieces of salmon...
Not only are they cheaper (you have to ask for these pieces because they aren't usually put out in the store), but most of the yummy omega oils are gathered up in the collars. Thank you, Christina, for this new discovery.

bloom

"Remember, we say
that a flower
is blooming whether it is in

half,

three quarters,

or full bloom." (C.P. Estes)

Tigridia: a flash of beauty

Meet: Tigridia
This flower blooms for one day, then quietly folds back into herself.

And another will bloom from the stalk, for a new day.


I think she is asking us to pay attention
(if we are listening, if we are noticing- for she does not shout)
I know some people who ask this as well.

Perhaps that is what being present-
alive inside our own experience,
our own frail, petal skin-
is about.

"What I want to say is
that the past is the past,
and the present is what your life it,
and you are capable of
choosing what that will be,
darling citizen." (Mary Oliver)

ourselves: in the sea

maggie and milly and molly and may
went down to the beach to play one day

and maggie discovered a shell that sang
so sweetly she couldn't remember her troubles, and

milly befriended a stranded star
whose rays five languid fingers were;

and molly was chased by a horrible thing
which raced sideways while blowing bubbles: and

may came home with a smooth round stone
as small as a world and as large as alone.

for whatever we lose like a you or a me
it's always ourselves we find in the sea.

e.e. cummings

..."i was a bride
married to amazement,
i was the bridegroom
taking the world into
my arms."

mary oliver

table colors

it feels like christmas lately...

with all these gifts...

my dearest red haired wind of life is coming for a visit
and my heart is leaping.

"catch it if you can. the present is an invisible electron; its lightning path traced faintly on a blackened screen is fleet, and fleeing, and gone...you don't run down the present, pursue it with baited hooks and nets. you wait for it, empty handed, and you are filled. you'll have fish leftover. the creek is one great river. it is, by definition, Christmas, the incarnation. this old rock planet gets the present for a present on its birthday every day." (annie dillard)

(mystic, ct)